6 Ways to Make Peace With Your Past: If you are facing difficulty in focusing in your present or thinking about your better future because of unpleasant situations or incidents in your past, you should learn effective ways to achieve peace with your past.
1. Focus on Your Present
When you continue to hurt because of your past, it is obviously difficult for you to focus on your present. However, you may perform different things to achieve your goal. For instance, you may inculcate the habit of mindfulness meditation on a daily basis to encourage yourself to turn towards your present feelings, experiences and sensations.
With time, the mentioned exercise will help your brain to stay more in your present as compared to focusing in your past or in your future. Moreover, by keeping yourself busy and leading a fulfilling life helps you to move a long way towards living in present, as this reduces your available time to bother or even think about anything took place in your past.
2. Express Your Negative Feelings and Pain
You should express your negative feelings and pain you have related to your past, such as your jealous feelings, anger and sadness without only wallowing yourself in such emotions. For this, you should opt for different approaches to perform the exercise-
- Speak directly to those individuals responsible to cause distress feelings in your life. However, in case you find the approach as impossible or an inappropriate one, you should never forget trying other methods.
- You should try writing a note or letter by mentioning about your distress or pain and about the respective individuals. This helps you gaining a sense to communicate to the respective people and getting out of your emotions from your inner system.
- If you still face difficulty to write a note or letter, you should maintain a journal or simply communicate your feelings to any trustworthy person, say your best friend.
Once you express your pain and give a few thoughts to roles you have played for any unpleasant situation in the past, you should take responsibility of your own faults. This step lets you to learn and be happy in your near future.
3. Keep Yourself Mindful with Many Intruding Thoughts
Obsessing about your past is one the bad habits and it requires time to overcome. This means, your mind will often return to your past’ thoughts for a while and hence, you have to adopt a sound strategy to deal with this situation by following healthy steps. For this, you should remind yourself about your present focus i.e. anything positive, which exists in your present life. The refocusing procedure thus results in affirmation or positive association from a specific object you look or touch.
4. Analyze Your Possibilities to Assure Your Happy Future
In some cases, we often struggle things to let go from our past, as we wish things may return in the same way in some respect. We usually fail to be happy and satisfy us in our near future; instead, we tempted for living with our bad memories. However, if you have to move ahead, you have to analyze the possibilities of your happy future.
For this, you may opt to set few of your concentrated goals and start looking for ways, by following which you may easily achieve such goals. In the same manner, you may involve yourself in new hobbies to occupy your energy and time, while get concrete evidence related to your development in various positive ways.
5. Give Back that Embodies Your Values
Give back at the forefront may not strike in your mind initially while you take steps to cope with your negative feelings and pain from your past incidents. However, doing anything beyond yourself and particularly the one, which embodies your individual values is an excellent way to focus on your present, boost your self-esteem and help you to become relatively less myopic about the external world.
You will find many ways to give back, which include helping others in any care home, volunteering in any soup kitchen and working in a poultry firm or animal shelter. If you still have doubts related to ways of giving back yourself, you should prepare a list of your passions and have a look at various altruistic ways related to expressing them.
6. Learn to Forgive You and Other People Both
Last, but not the least, forgiveness is the most important associated with overcoming the bad memories of your past. For this, you have to extend it to individuals, who did anything wrong to you by accepting the fallibility as well as reflecting a few reasons behind such type of behavior. You do not require letting such people back in your life, but you should never carry hate feelings towards them, as doing so is toxic for you only. An effective way associated with discharging the hate feelings is to go with a forgiving attitude. Forgiveness also lets you gaining trust feelings from others in the near future. Simultaneously, you should forgive you by learning from your mistakes and give compassion to you to make sure of your better future.